If you haven’t seen this anywhere else yet (I’m sure you have!), today is World Mental Health Day.
It’s such a significant day. Promoting the awareness of mental illness. Allowing others to know that it is SO okay to NOT be okay.
It’s a great day to reach out to friends. Check up on them. If you’ve seen some red flags in a loved one, don’t be afraid to ask questions. Being seen and heard could genuinely save someone’s life! And if you have a friend who seriously seems to have it all together, definitely reach out to them. Sometimes, the most dangerous symptom of all is the mere act of hiding symptoms from others.
But what I wanted to write about, finally, at 8:30pm…is the truth.
The truth is that I often feel very low. The truth is that I experience the symptoms of Anxiety every day, but remain high-functioning. The truth is that I have to work so hard to maintain the positive mindset that I speak about so often. And yes, the hard work pays off! Of course it does! But all of the mindset work and all of the workouts in the world can’t completely “cure” me of the brain monster.
The truth is that pregnancy hormones have me crying at the drop of a hat, but sometimes it feels like so much more than that.
The truth…is that I often feel lost or alone.
Why?
Because mental health issues often result in irrational thought patterns. And yes, I work to combat those thoughts and feelings at all times…but friends, not every day will be perfect.
The truth is that I spent the day thinking I needed to write. Needed to say SOMETHING about World Mental Health Day. Needed to keep pumping out the message that no one ever has to fight alone. And yet, there I sat, surrounded by the cycle of negative thoughts. Thinking that my words wouldn’t be good enough. Thinking that others are struggling so much harder, so my bad days aren’t worth sharing.
Suddenly, the spiral goes down deeper. This will still exist when I’m a mom. How will I be a good example for my child? Am I annoying my husband? I’m not good enough.
It goes on and on. Many of the thoughts and feelings seem so trivial, but it doesn’t change the fact that they began racing through my head over and over for hours.
And then, while I had myself trapped in isolation, in my little dark corner, something happened.
A near and dear friend posted on Facebook today, admitting that he had been experiencing multiple panic attacks. He put himself out there, despite always being the one to hold a smile and keep people laughing and feeling good.
Another best friend spoke, out loud, about her experience with mental illness on a podcast. OUT LOUD, friends. On a podcast! Way out in the open. I felt so proud of her.
And yet another friend quit her job. It was getting increasingly more toxic for her, taking a huge toll on her mental health and her life. And, with some encouragement from her fiancé, she quit today. WOW. Talk about strength, you know?
And once I let it sink in that other people in my life were sharing their words and voices to remind others that they never have to fight alone…I realized that I needed to get over the lack of interest in opening my laptop to write.
Catharsis is everything, folks.
So here I am, roughly 14-15 hours after I initially *wanted* to write. After the lack of interest set in, along with all of the worry over every single aspect of life.
My friends shared their stories. Those messages seeped into this lil brain of mine. I remembered that I have a message to keep sharing, every day, throughout this life.
If you are struggling with a mental illness, you matter. You’re strong. You don’t have to hide. I see you; I want to hear you.
And for anyone out there experiencing wonderful mental health days, remember that it’s SO important to take that energy and keep reaching out to others. We’re all on this earth to take care of each other, which is pretty freaking beautiful.
Happy World Mental Health Day, friends. Sending love and light to all.
-Brittni
Brittni Stephens 